Speaking of writing, I promise I'll get to the next couple of parts, writer_chick. Things have been a bit busy.
Oh, and those of you who send mail to my Earthlink address might get a challenge message. Sorry about that. It's just gotten to the point where I'm getting so much spam, I need to turn on their SpamBlocker. Their SpamBlocker uses the online address book to decide who shall pass, so to speak. Naturally, they don't have a way to import an address book into the online address book, meaning that either I (a) type in over 200 entries or (b) add your addresses as they come in.
Anyway, off to work.
A man dies and is sent to Hell. Expecting to be cast immediately into the fiery pit, he's surprised to see that he's in a rather sparse waiting room. Several seconds later, Satan enters and welcomes him. When the man asks about the fiery pit, Satan explains that people have a choice of how they'd like to spend eternity.
He leads the man to three steel doors, each of which has a glass porthole. The man looks through the porthole on the first door and sees people being burned by the unquenchable flames. The second door shows people being tortured in all manner of gruesome ways. The third door shows people standing waist-deep in sewage, drinking coffee from styrofoam cups and eating doughnuts. Naturally, the man chooses the third door. Satan unlocks the door and the man wades in, gets himself a cup of coffee and a doughnut, and begins mixing with his fellow damned ones.
Five minutes later, Satan appears in the room. "All right, everyone, break's over. Back on your heads."