If you had a crowbar and could smash anything in your home or office, what would it be? Why?
I'd like to take the computers out of my office, get a big dumpster, and throw everything out. Start over again. I don't really hate anything, I'm just tired of this room.
What fictional character do you relate to most and why?
My character Mary Cecelia O'Brian. Of all the characters I've come up with, she's the one the most like me.
Has anyone ever done something so horrible to you that "I'm sorry" couldn't fix it?
A guy I befriended in high school decided that life had been unfair to him and basically blew off the second half of senior year, while simultaneously concocting this fantastic bullshit story about how he was going to Stanford. He kept this up until he was supposed to go off to school, then sends me a letter saying it was all a lie. I forgave him, but I just couldn't keep being his friend. I felt really betrayed and like I was played for an idiot.
If you had to pick a time period to live in, which would you choose? Why?
If I could go back and relive my life starting in 1970, I would. I really cheated myself out of a good time.
When you're having a bad day, how do you react?
Blow everything off and start again the next day.
If your daily life had a theme song, what would it be?
The Beatles' The Fool on the Hill.
What's your nickname, and how did you get it?
My family has always called me Johnny. My grandfather was John, so I guess they needed to tell us apart.
If you could be cast on any TV show, from any time, who would you play?
Rick Simon, Gerald McRaney's character on Simon & Simon.
What's the worst job you've ever had?
Consultant for my former company, particularly the part where I was product expert on a really crappy product (which they've since dropped).
What three dishes could you live on for the rest of your life?
Pizza, hamburgers, and Italian combo sandwiches (beef and sausage).